Weight and Waiting

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Another day at work. I am kind of in limbo on some projects which makes it hard to work. I did finish the book someone needed me to read and worked a little bit. I hate days when I feel like I’ve accomplished nothing, though.

Hm, I’ve just sat here for five minutes trying to think of something to write that would be interesting. What I really want to write about is my weight, but that is such a personal thing. I have been thinking a lot about strongholds lately as I am doing the Bible study Breaking Free. Most people who are overweight got that way after high school. Not me. I have been heavy and trying to lose weight since I was 9 years old. That is 14 years of this. It disgusts me. I feed myself so many lies–or repeat those from the Devil–I have no willpower. It runs in the family. I can never change. Life’s too short to deprive myself.

These things are not true. If I want to be a mom, I need to lose some of this bulk. I don’t want my children to suffer from generational strongholds. I want to show them what eating is like when you don’t have to think about it constantly. I want to eat to live.

So something’s gotta change. I can’t live by urges and cravings. How debase does that sound! If I truly have the mind of Christ, I need to learn how to use it.

Jess

One thought on “Weight and Waiting

  1. First, go check out my blog for the winner of the contest.

    Second, I think that we set ourselves up for this struggle with weight loss because of the “guilty” “decadent” attitude you describe. Girlfriend, you must get your hands on a copy of “The Fat Fallacy”. I’m telling you it will change your life.

    My approach to food is much like my approach to unschooling. Check out the book I mentioned….you will love it.

    In the meantime, be gentle to yourself while going through whatever process you choose. The weight will have a harder time coming off if you are hard on yourself!

    Love,
    Evie

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