Distrust

This post may contain affiliate links. Please see my Disclosure statement for more details.

I just started doing this Bible study last week on jealousy. My Bible-study teacher, Shawn, actually wrote this one herself. She is so amazingly talented and wonderful, beyond measure the best Bible teacher I’ve ever had.

The main idea of week 1 is that jealousy really boils down to trusting God. In the areas where we don’t truly trust God, we get jealous of other people. I find myself so jealous of women who have it all together. Especially of people who have some 10-year-plan. Of course, people like that are probably faking it–and I honestly don’t think having a 10-year plan is really listening to God’s leading, unless He’s specifically laid it out. But still…oh, how I want that. I guess you would say my main area of distrust is pertaining our immediate future as a family–even a 2-year-plan!

I guess it’s obvious from my blog title that my husband goes to Vanderbilt! He is a grad student there, in year 4 of 5 for his PhD. It’s been a long ride, and all of a sudden next May seems to be getting very close!


Mr. Vanderbilt is so laid back…he is willing to wait it out and see where life will take us. He is perfect. I would be a maniac already if I were in his shoes, worrying about jobs and moving and what ideal city we would be in. I worry enough for the both of us, not that I am proud of it. I worry for me about when we will have children, if I will be able to stay home with them, if I will be a good mom, and especially if we will live near our parents. We love Nashville, but it’s a good 14 hour drive from Moms and Dads, and that has been really hard on me. I worry that if we aren’t able to move within an hour of parents, they will be disappointed. I worry Mr. Vanderbilt will want to move to Hawaii.

Why can’t I just trust concerning this? I trust God for my eternity; there is no reason I shouldn’t be able to trust him for the next few years!! Maybe sometime in the next few weeks I will be able to understand this better.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *