New Choices

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LinkI’m feeling torn this afternoon.

I haven’t had a chance to do a Wednesday night Bible study at church for awhile, since I have taught a missions group to girls for 3 1/2 years. I have participated in a wonderful home study with Shawn, done a very brief Sunday afternoon study at church, and led several studies in mine and others’ homes. But Wednesday morning and nights are when our church offers the women’s studies that most women participate in, the good stuff!

I really want to do Esther with a group. I’ve actually already bought the workbook, and it’s just sitting in my office, yet to have been cracked open. And my church is offering it on Wednesday mornings and Wednesday nights. I work full time, of course, so the morning is not an option.

And I’ve sat here for a while debating in my head whether I can give up the precious hours I have with my baby girl.

It’s not that I haven’t been in the Bible studying recently. I use the time I am pumping in my office to read a One Year Bible. And reading Bible studies is my JOB, for goodness sake!

But I love that community with other women and feel that my faith deepens by that interaction. At the same time, Libbie will only be this small once and I treasure each little minute playing with her. Pretty much all of her awake time at home is between 5 and 8.

I could take her to the study with me, but of course it would be distracting and I would have to leave in the middle if she needed to eat or started to fuss.

Experienced moms, what is your advice? I am feeling in my heart that I need to be there with my daughter as much as I can. But I know in my head I also need to pursue the relationship with my Father as deeply as I can!

7 thoughts on “New Choices

  1. Go on WEd. night. You need the time to yourself (outside of work) to rejuvinate, so that when you are with the precious little one you can be the best mom you can be. A few hours a week where you are congregating with friends and learning and sharing will be a great asset to your daughter in the long run…. trust me I’m just figuring this out with a six year old. I wish I had done something similar when he was younger. Peace, Sam D. (from PBS) 🙂

  2. I have not had the experience of working full time while Mommy-ing so I don’t know if my thoughts will help. 🙂 Based on what you wrote in that post, if it were *me* and there was an evening study that fit with our family’s schedule, and if there wasn’t a problem with taking my baby, I would take her to the study. This is a short season in her life, but you are right, I think the time with those other women in so important. And, in my experience (and depending upon the group of women) there are always willing arms to help snuggle a baby at Bible study so that mama can bring her baby and get some adult-time.

    I stay at home with my girls and have been in a women’s (daytime) study for some time now. I always take my nursing infant and keep them right with me. And, once she gets big enough to need some floor time, I always took a big think blanket and found a spot where we could spread out with a few toys. Then she had room to roll and stretch and I could sit beside her and listen and take notes.

    You’ll find a groove that works for you. 🙂 (And the Esther study sounds good! My study now is a Kay Arthur precept on Isaiah – ack! it’s hard!) 🙂

  3. Well, I'm doing the study on Monday nights and even with my kids being 14 & 20, I still feel like I don't spend enough time with them. So I don't think that issue will ever go away in your mind.

    But I have 2 young mothers attending and they will not give up their one night a week away from their beloved families. In fact they threatened to come to my house on Monday nights when we suspended the meeting during the Christmas break. They did finally tell their husbands that the classes weren't meeting.

    From these ladies, their greatest joy of the meetings was being able to get away by themselves. One mother talks on her cell phone as she drives to the meetings and catches up with friends that she can't during the day. And it gives their husbands an opportunity to have a night alone with their children too.

    It's a great study!

  4. I’m like Stephanie and don’t have to juggle both schedules but I definitely agree with Sam abou the needing time to yourself to rejuvinate and be a good mommy. Perhaps if you aren’t taking her she can get some good daddy one-on-one time in, that is important too!

    Glad you have taken to getting support from others, that is so important! And I pray for you daily because I don’t know how working mothers do it!

  5. I dunno. Part of me thinks that you should go with your heart and spend that time with your daughter. But, maybe you could take her along and see how she does? I think it would be ok if you needed to feed her or tend to her while there, but if you think it would be too much of a distraction for yourself, that’s understandable. As another mom in the room, I wouldn’t be distracted by your daughter.

    I kind of want to rejoin a women’s group that I had been a part of last year, but it takes me 45 minutes to get there. I’d take my baby with me but I’m wary of taking him out while he’s so young. Maybe in a few months.

    I also see the advantage of having some time away. Last night, I went to the grocery by myself. It took all of 30 minutes, but it was nice to get out of the house. I haven’t been doing much of that lately, since Jonathan is so young (3 weeks) and it’s been so cold.

    Good luck with whatever you decide!

  6. You need to do the Esther Bible study and leave precious Libby with her dad. From years of experience both as a mom and as a Christian woman seeking to deepen my relationship with Christ I have learned that it is important to you and your child to spend time in fellowship with other Christian women and study God’s word together. You will find that you will actually be a better mom for having done it.

    I am currently leading the Esther study on Wed. mornings and I think you will really love the study. I have lead a morning group for about 5 years or so now. We used to have several babies/toddlers that came along to the study on a regular basis (including my granddaughter) because that was the only way for some women to participate. Currently we only have 1 who’s about 7 months old. From my own personal experience and from other mom’s in the study we all agree that if there is anyway to do it “on your own” it’s really the best experience. Don’t get me wrong, we love passing babies around, but we all (including the mom’s) feel they get so much more out of the study and the fellowship when we don’t have the kids with us.

    I know how hard it is to leave your little one. But there will always be times when you think “their only this age once” and you want to spend time with them. Believe me when I say one evening a week to rejuvinate your your spirit will do more for you both than you can imagine.

    Let me know what you decide. You’re always in our thoughts and prayers.

  7. The Bible study is only an hour and you’re at church anyway, I vote that you leave her with dad for the time and do the Bible Study!
    I let myself leave the Daniel study halfway into it b/c I felt guilty about the time away from my daughter, but i never finished it!

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