I Wonder If You Wonder

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Some nights, I wonder if you ever wonder if you were wrong.

If He did indeed die on the cross and rise on the third day … then that should make a difference in your life.

Because sometimes, I doubt. Never the presence of God, but occasionally I wonder … what if someone made it all up?

And I wonder if you wonder, what if they didn’t?

That tiny word faith fills my heart, and I don’t believe I can get through the day without Jesus. I don’t believe I deserve anything but hell but live a grace-filled life despite of circumstances. A life that will be eternal, not stopped by the failed body.

I often wonder about you, who said you believed this, who was sprinkled or dunked or catechized. And then poof, that spark, it died.

Do you ever want to resuscitate it?

I wonder if you ever wonder if you are wrong.

7 thoughts on “I Wonder If You Wonder

  1. Hmmm… deep thoughts and good questions. I am Catholic, so I was dunked as an infant. And I honestly don't really wonder… NOW. But I was that girl who doubted and questioned and wondered incessantly when I was 13 and about to be confirmed. I went to over half a dozen different churches and talked to more people than I could list. I remember feeling like I was really BAD for that. Because I didn't whole-heartedly throw myself into it all with passion and conviction. But. When I did decide to be confirmed. I was sure. And I remain sure. But I'm not sure I would be if I hadn't questioned so very much in my past. Not sure if that rambling made sense. 🙂 All this to say- good thoughts. Real thoughts. Real heart. <3 you.

  2. I think they do wonder if it is true, but don't want to change the way they are living. That may be why deathbed conversions are common – waiting until the last minute. Sadly, they miss the joy – and rewards – of spending a life serving Him.

    My wonderings often run to why He sticks with me; so often I feel so unworthy of His grace and mercy it is overwhelming. My head knows I'm forgiven; sometimes, my heart forgets.

  3. I do wonder. I wonder all the time. How do we know what we know?

    I believe. I have faith that He is real, and it's not made up.

    But sometimes, especially in church (isn't that totally bizarre?), I wonder.

  4. Maybe it was my upbringing but I always believed there was a God. And faith keeps my believing that He is real and His death and resurrection is real. I struggle with other things – does He really love me in my sinful state, does He know what's best for me, will he really let me into Heaven? I think it's normal to wonder but faith and true trust makes it only a fleeting thought and not a living testimony.

  5. I don't wonder about fundamentals — I DO believe that Jesus died on the cross and was resurrected and that he is the son of God.

    I think the parts I wonder about are smaller matters of doctrine. Like God's view on birth control. Or tithing as Christians. Those are things that make me wonder if I'm wrong.

  6. I just had this conversation with my best friend over dinner last night. Sometimes it all seems so fantastical but I guess that's the definition of faith. To be honest, it's not Jesus or God that I doubt…I know they are good and real…it's people I doubt. The people that recorded the stories, the leaders of countless churches that produce fancy but ineffective ministry…and in the end these questions compel me to focus more on Jesus then I ever did before. And I suppose that is the beauty of faith. Thanks for posting such honest questions.

  7. I don't wonder, but I do envy. You know that I just can't believe anymore and I'm envious of people who do. I do NOT think you deserve hell, if it even exists, fwiw.

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