Make Love Happen

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I’m reposting this from September 2009 to see if anyone’s met their spouse in the last almost-three years or has a new online dating story they want to divulge. I hope you’ve never been as stupid as I was at 17.

This past Saturday, Mr. V and I invited a few of his fellow teacher-friends over to our (basically unfurnished) house in Chattanooga. He had connected with some of the other new teachers at a conference they all had to go to in July, and he was eager for me to meet them.

Being old and married, I had to giggle when the conversation turned to something I am completely unfamiliar with: online dating sites. Apparently there are more than I had ever dreamed of—not only match.com and eHarmony, but also okcupid and plentyoffish and christiancafe, just for starters.

It made me very thankful to be married. Mr. V’s friends repeatedly told us that we were very lucky to not have to be dating, and I wholeheartedly agree.

Many, many moons ago, online dating was just a spark in someone’s head and meeting people from the Internet almost assured you’d be found somewhere dead, cut into pieces, and stuffed into a shoebox.

Which is why what I am account to you is one of the stupidest things I’ve probably ever done.

One of my best friends in high school, Cynthia, and I worked together in an aftercare program at the daycare at our church. One day she came in and said that she was going to get together that night with her Internet boyfriend and she wanted me to come along. Her guy would invite a friend for me.

It was a little daunting, but we would drive separately and meet them in a public place, so how bad could it be? Plus I had had a sum total of maybe two dates all of high school. So, I mean, really.

So we went to wherever we were meeting them, and they were going to follow us to the movie theater. Which is when we noticed that one of the tires on my car was nearly flat.

Oops.

So Cynthia and I let them drive and we all went together. In a car. With guys from the Internet. (My dad may kill me for this NOW, 11 years later.)

The sad part is, it was fine. And I really liked the guy they set me up with. And he never called me again.

Not even guys from the Internet liked me.

But now, I’m happily married, and I hope that guy is looking for dates on RednecksConnect or something.

I wonder if, 20 years from now, everyone’s parents will have met on the Internet. There won’t be as many cute, saw each other across the room stories. But it is interesting, people connecting (somewhat) for personality more than looks. (Maybe? Again, I’ve never done any online dating site stuff.)

I have to know: Have you ever met someone from one of these sites? Your spouse? Spill!

14 thoughts on “Make Love Happen

  1. Internet didn't even exist when we were dating … early 70s. So here's how I took matters into my own hands.

    Picture it: Christmas 1973. I went to see Santa at one of the local department stores. I sat on his lap and told him I wanted a tall, dark, and very handsome boyfriend. The next month I met Ed, and we married at Christmas 1974. If all else fails … ask Santa! He delivers!

  2. My husband and I often comment about how glad we are to not have to date in this day and age. I can't even imagine. Although, he says we should sign up for eharmony and see if it sets us up. *eyeroll*

    I do have two internet dating stories to share- though neither are about me. My roommate in grad school met some boy on one of the dating sites and invited him to our apartment before she had ever met him in real life. I was mortified! You know- the whole chopped up in a box thing! Plus we were two girls living alone in an apartment in New Orleans- it's just not safe to invite strangers in!

    On the other hand, we have good friends who met on the internet and are now happily married. On their wedding website they made up a story about meeting at a coffee shop because the family wouldn't have approved. She also left a note on the website to ask the husband "his side of the story," and he would tell people (other than her family) the truth.

  3. My brother found his wife on the internet. He was a really great date-able guy, just too busy flying fighter jets to find his dream girl. And, may I say, he found a nicer, prettier Christian girl than he'd ever brought home before?

    I think it's a great option for post-college dating especially when neither party likes to hang out in bars.
    Meredith

  4. I too feel blessed to be blissfully married and not in the dating game right now. I do not live vicariously through my single friends. They're the ones that have it hard.

    My hubby and I know for a fact that eHarmony would NOT match us up and that's pretty hilarious.

  5. I met my husband on match.com. I was really worried at first about doing it that way, you hear about the crazy people who are on there) but my aunt and uncle had friends who met there. Since I was new to the area, I decided that I would try it out. There was somethings that I did to be sure he was not crazy that was, meet him in a public place, we talked for about 2 weeks on the phone and then met. We were both living in a new place and I would suggest it to anyone.
    I think that internet dating is really helpful especially if you are new to a place.

  6. We say the SAME THING every time we see those commercials: "thank the Good Lord we don't have to go through that now". We met at SPACE CAMP, my friend. And it was love at first launch.. hahahah!
    Really- we were both camp counselors and it's really a breeding ground there! ha!

  7. I met my husband on match.com. At the time we met we lived one block from each other. We never would have met if it hadn't been for match. We certainly didn't travel in the same circles!

  8. My husband and I met on match dot com. We told everyone the truth about how we met, but people still find it a little funny! I met and dated four or five guys on there, and had great experiences…I guess having low to no expectations did the trick!

  9. Met my husband on Yahoo Personals and it was great! Went out with a handful of different guys within a week and was super careful about information I divulged, where we met, telling my sister when/where I'd be meeting them, etc. And they were all nice and not scary. But once I met my husband, I knew I didn't want to go out with anyone else. We married in Hawaii 9 months later and are now (2+ years later) expecting our first baby any day now. I would highly recommend it as long as you are super careful with it.
    -Kimberly in NC
    knchock at yahoo dot com

  10. My husband and I met on Match.com. I never thought it would be something that I would ever do, but so glad I did. We were both divorced and looking for that someone special. God most certainly had plans for us, way beyond our wildest dreams. From the time we met, we were married with in 6 weeks. We have 5 kids between the 2 of us and approaching our 3rd year anniversary.

  11. My mother set me up on eHarmony, at 4am one night while I was staying with her. Probably the most honest profile as I answered questions sitting on a milk crate leaning against the doorframe of her tiny office half asleep. I wouldn’t have done it had she not paid for the first 3 months and several “that’s it I’m done” months as well over the next 3 years.

    However, 3 months after my now husband joined we met online the end of March. By the next day I realized we were talking on my real email, not the fake name keep me safe email I had set up for this whole mess.

    He came to visit me the 3rd week of April, went to lunch WITH MY PARENTS, and I took him with me to go pray for a horse (long story, I blame my mother) none of that scared him off. He continued to drive 5 hours one way to see me every weekend, with the weekend turning into Thursday through Tuesday stretches.

    He proposed the first part of June and we were married that July 21st. That was 7 years ago. We now have a 5 year old son and know that we know that we know God brought us together through eHarmony.

  12. I met my husband on Match.com in 2003. I was newly divorced. I lived in a small, rural Ohio town. I knew most of the men who were single in my small rural Ohio town. And I didn’t want to date any of them (or they didn’t want to date me…whatev). I was an oddity being single, 30, and educated. Most men didn’t know what to make of me. So, I cast my net further. I was only looking to have a little fun dating. I was very cautious and careful. (My ex-husband and I were not on good terms and when he heard I was dating from the internet he was livid. He said I was going to end up dead somewhere and he would end up getting blamed. Heh.)
    Anywhoo, sometimes it was fun. Sometimes it was awkward. I had 1 guy who creeped me out but I could tell that from our phone call so I never met him. And then I met Steve and fell hard.

  13. Hubs and I met on ChristianCafe almost 11 years ago. It was really just a chatroom back then – not an official matchmaking site. We were both in college and just cruising chat rooms. This December, we will have been married for 10 years (& 4 kids.)

    We did live in different cities and met, in person, for the first time in Gatlinburg. And, if any of my daughters drive three hours alone to meet a guy from the internet, I will skin them alive. 🙂 But, for us, I believe God orchestrated it all and used the internet just so we would have an interesting story to tell. He’s fun like that.

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