Chatting on the Couch

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When I rebranded this site with my name in big old letters about a year ago, I tried to focus in on what I wanted to talk about here. I’m a lifestyle blogger; I’m not ever going to have a niche. I call myself one-third food blog, one-third parenting and home life, and one-third spiritual stuff.

What I really wanted was to invite people onto my couch. If you were here with me, in my living room (which is, of course, a DISASTER, let’s not pretend), what would we talk about? What would we snack on? What would we see around us?

Welcome to my couch.

So hey. Put your feet up. Brush off any crumbs that you see, and I’ll try not to notice. Let’s talk.

I’m making cauliflower soup right now. I don’t dislike cauliflower, and I hope it will help me get in some extra veggies. I’ve been trying to eat mostly grain-free, but I had some pasta for lunch (recipe I had tested for an article, just sitting there …) because I was super hungry after going to Zumba and getting haircuts this morning. And the pasta has made me SLEEPY. But since I can’t remember the last time I slept through the night, I guess I can’t blame it completely.

Last week was hard. I’ve felt a little nuts emotionally as of late. My two older kids seem especially out-of-control, and I’m wondering what on earth to do about it. Plus there’s just the normal feeling completely inadequate at everything I do. I am really trying to realize that no one has it all together. But I so often sit and think everyone else is living in Normal City, and I’m the only oddball. The one just trying to scrape by and totally exhausted by what qualifies as “normalcy” right now.

I miss my mom.

I promise I’m not all down-and-out. If you sit here long enough, the kids will ask you to play Frozen Spot It. And Joshua will probably sing for you, which is my primary source of entertainment right now. Libbie will probably put on dress-up ballet clothes and dance with passion, if not skill, around the room. David will tell you that Thursday is pajama day at his school and HE GETS TO WEAR PAJAMAS. ALL DAY.

I feel like maybe the winter blues are getting to me. Maybe that is the cause of my funk. I promise I am taking my medicine, using essential oils, exercising, and trying to eat right. A little more time with friends might help. A date with my husband. It’s been wayyyy too long since we went out alone.

So that’s what’s going on with me. I’m sorry to be grumpy, but it’s just kind of how it is right now. Maybe you could tell me a funny story or send me a YouTube video that will make me laugh.

The cauliflower soup, by the way? It’s edible. Needs work. Can I interest you in some granola instead?

9 thoughts on “Chatting on the Couch

  1. I’m a lifestyle blogger, too, and it can feel frustrating not to have a niche. I don’t have kids, so I don’t even have the “mommy blogger” title!

    If I were sitting on your couch, I’d stay right there to watch the kids and let you and your husband go out! 🙂 I hope you get that date night soon.

    I miss my mom a lot too. It seems to me like the older I get the more I miss my parents.

    • I was a lifestyle blogger before I ever had kids, too! If by that you mean rambled incoherently about whatever I wanted. 🙂 Thanks for taking the time to comment. Anytime you want to come by and babysit, you just let me know!

  2. “Normal” is an illusion, I think. I know I feel anything but normal most of the time. Yep, inadequate, stupid, socially inept and totally unsure exactly why God keeps me here rather than taking me Home.

    I think a lot of people (me included) spend a lot of precious energy projecting an image to others that we have it all together, and life is grand. Pfft. We’re just hiding, and wasting energy we need for what God put before us for right now. Isn’t that what authentic Christian community should be, to be able to drop that façade? We are called to “bear one another’s burdens”, but we focus on the cost of doing that rather than the blessing. My introvert self shudders at the thought of truly being transparent, of really engaging with others, but…even introverts need people they can call their own.

    Forgive me, it’s my late afternoon babble time. I get tired and my inner filter takes a nap. Plus I’m working some overtime on a project I need to get done (short break while a report runs now). My brain hurts.

    • Babble is always acceptable around here. I have started teaching our Sunday School class, and it’s requiring a lot of authenticity as I am forced to answer all the questions and be open so others will be, too. It’s hard for this introvert!! But it is forming community there, too, I feel. Loving that group and our time together.

      I agree … normal is an illusion. And boring. Who wants to be normal anyway?

  3. Cyber hug…& for me as well it’s been blah… Get up get animals moving & kids & hubby…go to work come home fix dinner or leave work go pick up kid from where ever then go home fix dinner then make sure homework..the kids shower..bed start over… It’s just not fun right now… & of course I think why am I complaining?? I have hubby..children(although right now not happy with them..18..15..13..) God DOEShave a sense of humor…I don’t have enough patience most days. I have a job…I get paid…it’s not what I wanted to do with my life but I HAVE a job.. A house..a van..I mean I DO have a pretty great life…I probably SHOULD excercise food intake… “Try” & stay away from my Pepsi.drink MORE water than my 60 oz..dark chocolate salted caramels..more than 2 cups of coffee.. U know… I’m sure my attitude would be better… But that’s effort…takes pro-activeness on my part. Maybe tomorrow 🙂

  4. I don’t have a funny story but just so you don’t feel like an oddball…my son thinks every day is pajama day at school (and I stopped arguing) and said son went to school today in just a sweatshirt and no coat in 20 degree weather. My 6 year old daughter had a major temper tantrum this morning over the fact that it wasn’t a snow day and she is “too scared” to go to the bathroom in our house by herself or be in any room in the house in which I am not. This parenting gig is waaaay harder than I ever thought it would be!

    • Oh gracious, yes. Who knew it was this hard? My mom made it seem so easy. My daughter is 6 and she REALLY wanted to just wear her PJs to school on Thursday, too, since David did. My husband said no. I was totally going to let her. Who’s it going to hurt? I don’t have the energy for fights that don’t matter. 😉

  5. Jessie, I read this post earlier & left it open while doing other things. I have prayed for you this morning. I’m not sure if it was the motherhood part or the missing mom part as both struck me deeply. Today may our God come alongside of you & minister to you exactly what you need to be comforted and to be equipped to handle the pressures of life. You asked for a laugh…well, this morning here is what caused me to laugh …
    Perhaps he didn’t lose his focus. Perhaps he is showing us to enjoy all that is set out before us along the way 🙂
    Blessings to you!
    PS – I stopped here this morning as I was looking for your Saturday Linky 🙂

    • Thank you so much for stopping by. I’ve decided to give up the Saturday Linky Love – it just seemed like one thing on my plate I didn’t need. I really, really appreciate your prayers and comment!

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